Wednesday, June 27, 2007

and now the weather

and now the weather

this is the sky right now in santa fe

i am deliberately not paying too much attention to anything lest i implode.

coming-back-together with brian, the Drummer of The Dresden Dolls. hard.
being back on tour. hard, but not so bad.
being around famous people. weird. but good. not hard.
being in touch with people who are dealing with dead or dying relatives and friends....

interspersed with trying to figure out which direction to take with my solo record. very hard.

it's been an odd month.

i did some yoga on the strip in las vegas:

someone commented with a bunch of questions in a row.
here are the answers:

#1. Is it really weird to be meeting all those hoards of fans after shows? You and Brian were really nice, but I couldn't comprehend what that feels like. I thought for a second I stared too long at you and we made eyecontact for a nano second (I think?) and I felt REALLY creepy. Like I looked like the creepy old lady in line.

no. it's not weird. not weirder than anything else. it feels like what it looks like. imagine having a birthday party every day for an hour and you get an idea. i love when people get all emotional. it makes me feel like i'm doing something right. it makes me a little sad when people feel they have to pre-amble with "i know you hear this a million times a day, but...." or "i don't want to sound like a creepy stalker fan-boy, but....". it's like, you and me, two people talking. you do you think i am? i LOVE THIS SHIT! i also completely relate to being on the other side. when i was around 16, i waited in line to meet edward ka-spel after a legendary pink dots show at axis in boston. my heart was racing like mad and i couldn't believe i was about to be face to face with the man who had written the soundtrack to my life and who had changed my whole musical mental landscape. i breathed and breathed deeper and rehearsed what i was going to say so i wouldn't waste his time or sound like an idiot. it was my turn and i looked straight at him and said "i hope that someday i will write music as beautiful as you do." and he smiled at me and was so kind and human, and talked to me and signed my whatever. and i'll never forget that interaction, ever. so i give that back every time i meet someone. the only thing that bums me out is when people don't make eye contact and don't seem like they actually want a connection. the other day, some guy was actually ON HIS PHONE and just handed his ticket to me and brian for an autograph without stopping to look at us, talk to us, or even say hello to us. we were like, what's the point, dude?

#2. Does it creep you out to know that everybody in line is lusting after you and frothing at the mouth? Because they are. Do you block it out or embrace it?

oh, come on. well, ok, i answer truthfully. i love being loved. and if it ever gets creepy, i'll duck out the back door and go home and read a book. easy. i'd also like to think that you're not speaking for everyone. there are plenty of fans that i meet that i think have no desire to fuck me, and that's fine and dandy. it probably means they're better able to listen without being....disturbed.

#3. Where does your confidence come from? Will you write a self help book? Because I had to stop myself from saying "Hi, My name is Jen, I work for an insurance company and my life is really lame.",then burst into tears.

oh, darlin'. i don't really know how to answer that. i think my confidence comes from being very lucky growing up and being given a very large and free playground in which to grow as a person and an artist. i was never shut down very much, and when i was shut down i had a lot of supportive teachers and family and friends. but i also had to deal with a lot of shit as a teenager and i think it may surprise you to know that a lot of what confidence about isn't just having it, it's being able to APPEAR that you have it. i can't tell you how many times i've been onstage freaking out that this/that/theotherthing is fucking up but i smile and bang away as if nothing is wrong. very much like life. act as if. people will buy it. i'm more insecure than you think. i just wait until the end of the night to talk about it.

#4. Have you ever heard of The Bindlestiff Family Cirkus? I saw them perform in Cleveland last night and I thought man, it would be awesome if The Dresden Dolls went on tour with them. They are like an old school punk rocky adult circus. Check them out!

FUCK YES!!! i've been down with those guys for years. they are amazing. we've never done a proper tour together but we have shared stages. sxip shirey (, with whom i often tour and collborate, is a performer and composer for the Bindlestiffs.


we sign autographs and meet fans after every set on this tour (which started in las vegas about three weeks ago and has crisscrossed the country twice).
sometimes people come up to me shaking and crying and loving our music and i love that and i hug them. we talk to hundreds of people every night. they're there, they're real, they're listening.
i never forget that, but seeing the human face of our music community reminds me to snap the fuck out of it. sometimes i get so caught up in the void that i forget who is out there.

the media is a trick mirror.
i go through phases with how much media i consume. sometimes i'll pile it all on and buy a stack of rolling stones and magnets and spins and catch up on my pop culture to see what america is being exposed to. often when i'm flying (and i make sure i balance out all the music garbage with some Teen People and the Economist or New Yorker).

i used to read all of these music magazines wondering where my band would fit in. it's only now that i've been realizing that i may forever be exempt from the world of mainstream media, and that's given me some food for thought. i used to look at these giant national magazines and wonder why bands who had a quarter of the fans that we did were getting giant photos and articles and hype. the dolls have been together for 7 years, we've always managed to miss every bandwagon and wave of hype, and lots of the bands i remember seeing so much of a few years ago have vanished. we've never declined. we've only grown. for the number of records we've sold and the amount of fans we have, we have stayed (by no means willingly, since we always answer to the call of the press when it comes) almost completely out of the mainstream spotlight for the duration of our career. sometimes i feel grateful (who else has managed to do that? besides the string cheese incident? i suppose if i knew, then i would be disproving my own rule. if i was aware of the unknown, how would it be unknown?). sometimes i feel gypped.

there will always be people richer than you, and people poorer than you, you will always see people who seem happier and sadder than you, more and less famous than you.
the key is not to try to get on top, the key is to make peace with what you've got. madonna sits at home and stresses about god knows what. the A-list celebrities have a laundry-list of fucked-up priorities that you or i wouldn't ever want to have to grapple with and most of them don't seem to be genuinely happy. meanwhile, people all over the world pay homage at the altars of superstardom and trash-gossip. why? this has been coming up as a topic of conversation on tour. the general theory is that it's always been this way but that it's particularly disgusting right now because the larger backdrop has become so threatening in it's hopelessness. the war? over it. darfur? AIDS? over it. the fattening and overmedication of america's youth? eh. paris? lindsay? THERE'S something we can all connect about. let's talk about THAT. ok!

we determined that people can't talk about the weather anymore because it's also too depressing due to global warming.
once you can't talk about the weather you are fucked - gotta talk about lindsay.

but i look at all this and i think about myself and where i fit into it. i was just reading an interview with jack white of the white stripes, he said

"in this day and age, every band wants to say, 'come look at what we do', all the time. 'you wanna see me in my underwear? you wanna film me while i'm sleeping?' america has traded culture for entertainment and technology. how can you ever come back from that?"

i stopped and thought. if anybody wants to see me (sleeping or non) in my underwear, i'm usually happy to oblige.

so. for whatever reason, jack white and i are different. should i feel guilty about that?

but there's something more to this. jack's saying that we've traded culture for entertainment.
i don't fully buy that. entertainment IS and has been a huge and important part of culture for...ever. jack white is an entertainer. technology is culture. always has been.
technology and entertainment ARE culture, they DRIVE culture. but i understand what he's saying....i was reading an interview with Bansky and he said something to the extent of

warhol's prediction is going to warp. in the near future you're not going to be waiting for your 15 minutes of fame; you're going to be waiting for your 15 minutes of anonymity.

in youtube and myspace culture we're all mini-celebrities. but i think what jack is actually complaining about, and Banksy as well, isn't the phenomenon itself so much as the content involved. if teenagers all over the world were myspacing at the speed of light about how they could use their collective power to end hunger or stop global warming instead of swapping britney snatch-shots, would anyone be worried? hell no. we'd be ECSTATIC.

whatever it is that drives me to want to connect to people on the level that i do, it simply is that way. thinking about it seems to be pointless. i can drive myself crazy this way.
what do i want to do?
why am i making a record anyway?
if i want to videotape myself in my underwear and someone wants to watch it, don't i have the responsibility to make it a meaningful underwear-video?
should i be thinking more about what i'm doing?
like, really sitting down and trying to make some larger, more comprehensive decision about my life instead of just constantly saying "sounds good" to whatever happens to land in my path?
should i learn how to play the piano? really? should i take a year off and learn how to sing before i destroy my vocal chords because i don't know what i'm doing?
at least that way i'll have more ammunition when the underwear-video police knock on my door.
it seems to be the rule that the more talented you are, the more you can get away with. but who determines if you're talented? dead end.

cyndi lauper thoroughly destroyed her voice, went to a voice therapist, and brought it back from the dead. she steams it before and after every show.
"you could blow it amanda" she says. "start now, while you're young".
jesus christ, i'm 31. that's YOUNG???
"do it while you can" was also her advice about my choice to sport the hottt bra onstage instead of the tank top:
"when you're my age, honey, fuggedaboutit". i love her.

debbie harry also shed some enlightening perspective on my struggle over the production of the solo record.
"ah" she mused "when i made my last solo record the producer stole it, got on a plane to [guam? somewhere.] and held it for ransom."
"what did you do?"
debbie harry is very calm cool and collected.
"i paid him and got it back."
"god, i'm sorry. that blows".

i used to make all of my decisions through some sort of divine, and perhaps naive, assurance that i knew what i was doing.
on optimistic days, i take my recent faltering and ambivalence not as a sign of weakness but as a sign of growth.
on those days, being not sure of myself = evolving into a person who is open to anything.
on pessimistic days being not sure of myself = being a totally neurotic and shit-scared wuss.

highlights of the past few weeks have included rosie o'donnell falling in love with us (how awesome is she?), singing "when u were mine" onstage with cyndi lauper in boston (can die happy now, pretty much), and playing at radio city music hall (both brian and i had a moment there). brian and i also sang "rainbow connection" to cyndi backstage in texas for her birthday. she was so sweet, she actually sang along at the end. she's such a solid fucking woman, she really tries hard to tie everybody together. i hope i'm like her when i grow up.

i took some days off in chicago and spent them with good friends, which fed me. we went on a boat (thanks to stuart):

lane the triumphant

jeffers and me



re: the myspace covers project: i am thinking of going home early in july just to tackle this. why fucking not? i will try to make it as fast and furious as possible, with, like, a 12-hour turnaround.
yay the internet.


from the COUTURE DEPT:

and since y'all keep asking:

the skirt came from katie kay's roommate's who run a clothing line called skin graft. they work out of their living room. i slept int eh living room. so technically the skirt and i slept together. and then, in true romantic fashion, we could never part. go see: &

the black boots, sadly, are last seasons. they were made by fine fine john fluevog ( and you could try ebay (the style is roosevelt).


here are some awesome dancing and busking musician brothers and sisters i saw in washington square park on a walk.
i bought a disc but can't find it right now so if you know them (they're local), drop a line


from the VIDEO DEPT:

there's a great new clip of me playing "astronaut (a short history of nearly nothing)" at the paradise last year
gorgeous camera work and lighting. edited by the stupendous peter sand.
i love this song. it was still a bit different back then, the ending has changed since this performance....but its goood: of you posted an alternate "california girls" homage (sorta) that KICKS OURS IN THE ASS:

aphex twin. it's long, but watch it, it's pretty fucking awesome. he's brilliant. i'd marry him if i was more into techno.


and here is a picture for jack white of me in my underwear,
which i coincidentally took in NYC in my hotel room long before i read his damning interview.

suck it jack



michelle said...

this is my favorite end to a blog ever. i second what you said, by the way, about the underwear and entertainment and technology fueling culture, and so forth.

i love those vegas ladies staring you down.

recently, i had a conversation with friends about how one cannot really RUN anywhere if they feel like it without getting perplexed/annoyed/even accusatory looks from others. apparently, running makes you look like a criminal...

but sometimes i just feel like running.

FireAngel said...

Okay I had all these words to say then I see you in your undies and now I forgot what I was going to say! :-P~~~

Oh I remember. I'm totally envious that you were in Santa Fe!!! I went there for 2 weeks, for the first time, last month and it was my own personal heaven. I plan to move there. My boyfriend is a registered nurse and I just gained that status myself (squee!) so I don't think we'll have too many problems.

Well I don't know if you are a fan of Indigo Girls or not but we happened to find out they were going to be there two days after we got there. We called the very next morning and they happened to have one more pair of "special" tickets. I took a bunch of pictures and video during the concert, which was in the center stage, 7th row (squee!), and went to a reception after with free hootch and food... and then they came in and mingled with everyone there!!! OMG!! It made my whole year.

Okay so now if we can get the Indigo Girls in one room, with lots of champagne and chips and guacamole, and then you in your underwear...

Can we do that? Hey, a girl can dream. :-P

Ethan said...

I think the difference is that you took a picture of yourself in your underwear because you wanted to or because someone asked you to, but what Jack described is people in their underwear so that someone will pay attention to them.
The problem is in a supposed move away from an intimate relationship between entertainer and entertained, in which there is a flow of ideas and energy back and forth, to one in which the entertainer is trying to do whatever the crowd asks for so that they have a crowd at all.
Someone like Jack White, and probably plenty of those bands with a quarter the fans of the DD but still in rolling stone, are being tossed into the public eye, many parts of which un-doubtably don't connect with the entertainer or their art.
So the picture of you in your underwear on your blog read almost exclusively by your fans is (I would guess, not actually knowing) a different situation than other entertainers sleeping in their underwear on a reality show, who's viewers connect to them more as cartoon characters than people.
Many mainstream entertainers, subjected to mainstream observation, probably struggle to connect with at least a fraction of the public in a meaningful way.
You, from what you have always said, are lucky enough to usually(?) only deal with fans who came to see you and connect with your music, not merely be entertained and nothing more. Maybe that's the difference between culture and entertainment? Depth of connection the audience is willing to experience?
Sorry I rambled, this topic always intrigues me.

Brandon said...

nice underwear!...looks like they came from the kids department at Target. I know you don't make as much money as the White Stripes but wearing the same panties that you wore in 6th grade is kinda taking it to the extreme.

I think the argument is once you have so much entertainment that lacks any substance then culture pays the price. Entertainment with no artistic merit is basically masturbation without the orgasm.

Andy said...

Confidence is very much the appearance of confidence.

Faith is usually the same thing.

Marciel said...

Hi Amanda,
I just got home from the hospital where my step-dad has been battling cancer. I have been to so many hospitals these last few months I have lost count. My grandma was hospitalized for depression. Even my pet rat, Wheeza Whizzle, had surgery last week and I've been to the vets a gazillion times.
Then I came home tonight after working overtime at work, talking with dr's & nurses all day, relaying info to my stepdads family out-of-state, trying to make sure my mom is eating. Giving Wheeza his meds. Thinking of everything I havent done b/c there is just not enough hours in the day...
Then I sit down and see that you posted a new blog. But not just any blog-- omg, you answered my questions! I really wasnt expecting that.
Amanda, I have been pretty tough these past few months. But now I am crying. Your blog made me so happy I jumped up and down and giggled. I havent did that in so long.
So, now that we are officially pen pals.. I didnt get to tell you when I met you cuz I was feeling all wacked out and nervous in my head but thank you.
I started listening to the Dresden Dolls a year ago. Your band was the first new music I had listened to since forever. You know how when you discover something new (when you think there is nothing new left to discover cuz man life is a bitch and it has beaten you down. boo.) and it renews your excitement for life? Then I read your blogs. And, god, you just made/make me think of all that I am capable of that I have never had the confidence for. Just everything, you know? And you know, life gets in the way of my little fantasy world of living the life of an artist. Bills to pay, too exhausted to write, the man keepin' me down.
But you and your music and blogs help keep that world alive, even if I may never live it.
Thanks for the response. I feel really special.

Annie B said...

bought the dolls albums this year.. slowly becoming more obsessed with you.. well-u and arctic monkeys...
i really enjoy reading you.. so wildly self centered and honest..
you sound like a girl from the suburbs of Boston.. much like myself.
this is the first time i have ever posted anything to anyone.. really not that savvy about these things.. however u do seem to inspire people , and i must follow this herd...
i would love to meet you like your so many fans.. but before the fans.. maybe around the pit in Harvard Square reading a used copy of "Geek Love" by Katherine Dunne for the fifth time.. or in line at the Brattle when they premired Kissed in the womens film festival in 1996..Maybe i did..
wish i made eye contact..
i need to be filled by such simplicities that have slipped away..self self self.. u get it...
eye contact is the only thing that brings us out of that self..
please read "Geek Love" if u haven't.......

a friend from afar u will never really meet...

peace out

jordan said...

"i am deliberately not paying too much attention to anything lest i implode." -may possibly be a new mantra for life. Thanks for that.

My advice for the solo record? Ukulele solos ;)But seriously, take it and run in all directions, just do what you please and it will please us to no short end.

It's likely a chain reaction with entertainment, America's fixation with celebrities seems to provoke the 'let's watch our celebrities take a crap! etc..' trend in entertainment. I'm not inclined to believe that the population uses pop-culture as a diversion from the smoldering ash heap that is the world; instead I'd say it's more of a diversion from sad empty lives, filled with taking out the trash and waiting in line at the bank instead of crashing expensive cars, partying, and stints at rehab. But really, Jack White must have terrible underwear, if he wears any at all. Underwear are rather meaningful and poetic, it's a pity he can't see that.

I'm having a mixed reaction to the fact that you are right now in Santa Fe. I'm currently 43 minutes away in Los Alamos, though after the sun set, lightning began in a glorious fashion. It's likely the same there. Enjoy your visit, remember to come back sometime?

Jules said...

"Because I had to stop myself from saying "Hi, My name is Jen, I work for an insurance company and my life is really lame.",then burst into tears.

oh, darlin'. i don't really know how to answer that."

Damn. This blog's made me think and occasionally resist the urge to hug the computer monitor, but it's never made me cry before.

michael said...

I was going to post a clever comment weaving together Moliere, Glenn Gould and the Monty Python song Always look on the bright side of life, But had the news on and Dick Chen..fuckwit asshole completely destroyed my good mood, at some point that rotten bastard has to get what he deserves right? Now I'm going to cheer myself up by singing Half Jack or Good Day While cleaning the house...If you need something to help cheer you up try performing The Misanthrope in your pajamas it's worked for me...

Laura said...

Lovin' the yoga on the strip i smell a new youtube video lol "Yoga with Amanda Palmer" I would watch that lol :o)

entropyartist said...

You become more and more human to me with each passing blog (Which seems silly, since, well, it's a blog) and I am awed by this outpouring of love and compassion and honesty that you share with us.
And I don't mean 'human' like you weren't before, but simply that it was all sort of mysterious and very far from where I am, but lo, here you are, building this connection with people you can't see; knowing some part of you, though I may never shake your's strange and wonderful.

Cait the Great said...

I know this may seem a strange or stupid question buts its been sort of been coming up whenever well... it happens to come up. What's happening with the Dresden Dolls? Like once your solo album comes out does that mean that the Dresden Dolls are kaputt? Like you recently, like just now, said that getting back together with Brian is "hard". Hopefully you two keep working together because I saw you once quite a while before Yes...Virginia came out, most mind blowing show I've been to. :) best of luck

Kristin said...

people all over the world pay homage at the altars of superstardom and trash-gossip. why?

There are two big reasons for this.

1.Much like with the popularity of reality TV, it’s because people are lonelier and more isolated now than ever.They did a study on this with actual science even.Anyway, people develop these relationships with you, or Gene Simmons’family, or with what Rosie had to say on the View and this makes them feel consonant with our culture and society. Ironically, our technology, which caused much of this, acts as a surrogate for us. For example, I don’t know you, but I got your records, and I’m engaging you (or you me) like we would any other person we know. Now when I was sixteen and PJ Harvey was my ultimate rock god I never would have thought about doing that, right. Nevertheless, here I am like a lifetime later trying to shoot the existential crisis shit with you and watching you try to make a record with Ben Folds. Instead of feeling paralysis and awe, I’m like “hey you both have made two of my favorite records – I bet this wont suck.” Ya know, it’s organic and approachable unlike, say, watching Mathew Barney and Bjork’s process.
2. You all our Gods. For reals. But like, not in that creepy Jesus sense, more in that really cool Greco Roman Paganism stuff or like Shinto. Like with Shinto (Hey, even Emanuel Lewis rates with that shit), you have these people who are considered living embodiments of some type of perfection or ideal and that, as a concept, is a lot less intimidating than Cyndi Lauper as my personal Jesus. Look at Brangalina (I know) but anyway here we go: Nearly everyone would want to be as wealthy, beautiful, enjoying as much pleasure, and as compassionate as they seem to be. These two are, if not specifically American then certainly Western, archetypes, no? ‘

Anyway I hope I haven’t bored the life out of you out or anything. I caught the show in Dallas and I was quite impressed with the War Pigs cover. But I think Glass Slipper is still the pan ultimate shit. (No doubt, you secretly hate it)

Amanda said...

I always imagined what it would be like to meet AMANDA PALMER. Amanda Palmer of the DRESDEN DOLLS!!! There were always the long, drawn out fantasies in my head about meeting you. I always thought that the first time that I would meet you would be the most incredible experience of my life.
I'm not even sad now saying that it wasn't.
I was actually a bit put off by you. I walked up to Brian to have something signed, and you interrupted us. Everyone always has nice things to say about Amanda Palmer. I resent the fact that my first Amanda Palmer meeting was not as pleasant as always expected. I've been to five Dresden Dolls shows over the past few years and this was my first face to face encounter with you.
I guess it wasn't as special as I imagined it would be, since I had already met the sweetheart of a drummer a few times previously to actually being at the show. He even met up with me in the lobby before the show when he was pressed for time. He's amazing. To quote "Mandy goes to Med School,"...

"he is a nice man. Thoroughly reliable."

There are always the fan girls that love you and your music. Standing in the lobby, I heard at least 10 people that walked by me who said something to the effect of
"this is the best day of my life, i've met amanda palmer."

Had I met you a year ago, the same words would have bubbled from my mouth.

There were also the people who had just heard your band for the first time in their life and were amazed by you and brian's stage presence and wanted to know more. There I was, standing in line, telling people everything they wanted to know about the Dresden Dolls...

"are they a couple?"

No, they're just two freaks who play in a band together.

"where are they from?"

Boston, Massachusetts, the most beautiful city in the world.

and you know the rest of the frequently asked questions. They're all on the website. I directed a lot of people to the forum, to the site and to the merch table.
It was funny when the girl that wasn't Katie Kay walked up to me and asked me if i was on the dresden dolls mailing list...
I sort of chuckled and said...I'm pretty sure I'm already on it.

Like someone said though, you're real. You were real to me when I met you. It wasn't the most fascinating or amazing day of my life. It wasn't my favorite experience, but you were real, you were live and you were just..a person. You were no longer the voice that comes out of my earphones, stereo or speakers, you were Amanda Palmer, live and in person.

Over the years, I've seen you on stage 5 times now. I've even been turned away from a show after waiting in line for 2.5 hours in the freezing cold Chicago wind. THANK YOU METRO, for being dicks about letting poor little FREEZING fan girls in! My best friend and I worshipped the ground that you walked on for so long. To me, now that i've met you, it's not that way anymore. I respect you for everything that you do, but you are no longer my's not to say that I don't get excited when I see you up on stage though..

I love the music that you and Brian make. I was up in the balcony sitting next to my mother and I squealed like a little girl when your piano and brian's drums were being rolled out. It had been the first time since my favorite show in October that those two instruments were back together.

Also, we went to Palmer park the other day here in Janesville. At some point, i'll take a picture of the sign for you.

I'm sorry for nudging you out of my way for a picture in Chicago.

The two people before me in line ended up having pictures standing next to only you with Brian on the side...

I love brian. He's the most amazing fellow that I've ever met in my life. And the show reminded me what an incredible performer that he is. I'm sure it was hard to get back on tour. It seemed as though there were a lot of emotional aspects in the way, but the both of you hid it quite well. Especially from the pictures that i've seen/actually seeing you guys live. The stage chemistry still seems to be there.

So, rock on with your bad self, and I can't wait to see what will come of your solo album. It will for sure be a different experience for us Dresden Dolls fans.

I'm pretty excited though, on July third, I'm going to Summerfest in Milwaukee to see Ben Folds for the first time. Hopefully it will be a great experience. We're also seeing AFI and good ole Weird Al that day as well. I read that he emailed you about the Shores of California video? that's pretty neat.

Well, doll, that's all i've got to say. I hope you read it, like you always read the blog comments. I'm sorry if you're put off by anything that I said, but it's all the truth.



Alex said...

Hi, Added a new value add to my blog this weekend - a news widget from I always wanted to show latest news for my keywords in my sidebar. It was very easy with this widget. Just a small copy paste and it was done. Great indeed.

Damien said...

Windowlicker is the second Aphex Twin video I ever saw, back in 2000, and it's as hilarious today, as it was then.

You, Amanda, are brilliant in every way. You say you love to be loved, and you give something worthwhile to the world, and the world gives you love, in return. Well done.

Enjoy your time.

HughieD said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hughie said...

Don't talk to be about the weather - here's what the weather did to my fair city of Sheffield earlier in the week...¤t=72fd5027.pbw

A Unique Alias said...

Man, I'm glad you posted the underwear shot, because I was pretty disturbed after that frickin video.

Wait . . . OH NO!!!!

Seeräuberoma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beautiful_Wretched_Liar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beautiful_Wretched_Liar said...

I wish that I had more courage. I really really do. At the true colors in Boston you made a dream come true. You gave me the personal connection with an artist that I admire greatly for her strength and beauty in both her performance and personality. I had so many things I wanted to say to you. Such as how your music has given me the power to have access to emotions that I have difficulty expressing on my own. Or how your determination to be who you gives me more freedom to just be me. Or how your blogs give me hope for the human race.

Unfortunately I am a spaz and no such words came from my mouth.

Well anyways:

Thank you so much for treating us with your beautiful rendition of creep. I am telling ya hun, you don't need that bulky piano. All you need is a ukulele. And that poor security guard who didn't realize who you were! Poor unfortunate soul.

Thank you SO much for signing my song book and my best friend's cell phone. Quite honestly I didn't really understand the purpose of having you sign the white cellular device for it has now faded. I still wish that I could have said something more but alas, my words failed me. Even when you asked the question of whether or not I played the piano I stuttered and jumbled my words. Tears sprung to my eyes with your beauty and how incredibly human you were. I loved to be able to see that you were real.

Thank you so much.

I hope that you understand. I feel that if anyone does... it would be you


ghysmo said...

i wrote you some days ago, asking you about the film (of chris kraus) 4 minuten.

so didn't you see it? will you go to see it?
it's because watching it, i had to think about you (from after the first 5 minutes until the end).
p.s. wrinkles or not, your still great!

not a fighter just a bleeder said...

who needs a bandwagon anyway?
walking may be slower, but it's waaay more fun.

Marika said...

Just have to say your underwear is adorable...I may be almost 20 but I still love underwear with crazy cute patterns and crap.

Hopefully when I'm your age I'll be in as good a shape as you are...

*takes up yoga*

Thanks for blogging, it was good to hear from you again.

emma said...

it's probably not the right place to say what I have to say so I apologize. It's been a long time since I wanted to tell you something but I didn't know how to contact you. I don't know if you gonna read this, or delete it and I am not sure it really matters anyway.
My brother died on October the 21th last year. When my father told me that he killed himself, I was in my room listening to Yes Virginia. I remember that the song I was listening to was Mrs O. In those situations, things don't happen like in movies, I mean, the world didn't stop turning, your voice kept on singing, I was just there, sitting on my bed, unable to realize. Music is very important to me. Every cds I own means something to me, it's the soundtrack of my life. I remember when I bought Jeff Buckley's Grace, I was 15 and I listened to it thinking to one of my sisters who lived far from me at that time. It's just details. Yes Virginia reminds me of my brother's death. I can't listen to it anymore. It's not your fault, it's just that I can't. My brother was a sad person, a lonely one. We didn't like the same things. But he liked your band. It was a rare thing we had in common. We had listened the first album together in his car and he liked the song "missed me". It's one of my best souvenir of him. It's been almost a year since he is dead but the pain remains. When I think of him, the music I hear in my head is your music. I don't know if musicians and artists think about what could happen with their music when they create it. I don't know if they know that people around the world would use their music as the soundtrack of their lives, that their music would be hear in good, tragic, amazing times in the lives of unknown people.
I feel ridiculous because it's not the right place to say that, I can't even explain correctly how I feel because english is not my language, it would have been a lot more easier in french. But all this message to finally say that I thank you for what you are, thank you for your music.

Susie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Susie said...

"You are what you love, not what loves you, I decided that a long time ago."
I would like to tell you how much i appreciate your candidness.
It's the first thing that i read anything writen by/about you. I only know your music.
It's really important to act according to our nature. *

sexy said...