Tuesday, March 21, 2006

De-Poisoning

i never post direct follow-up blogs, but in case it just seemed to be necessary.

i came home to boston from texas tonight, went out and drank with my housemates, caem home again, read all of your posts, and turned off my computer.




then i ran a bath.






then i i sang along to/danced in the kitchen to/lip-synched into the bathroom mirror to every single song from the smiths "the queen is dead".
i stopped "mr shankley" and leanred the chords on piano. the bath sat there.


"the boy with the thorn in his side" had particular relevance.






then i took a lukewarm bath and kept listening. fine.







then i turned the computer on and wrote this.


now i'm going to bed.










there is a light and it never goes out

there is a light and it never goes out

there is a light and it never goes out

there is a light and it never goes out

there is a light and it never goes out....


















love
a

46 comments:

dimstar said...

i'm the first to comment i guess,yay me or something,anyhow it's a great album that you were listening to woowee the smiths make me feel so great,i hope you've been doing ok and i hope you've been eating pears,if you ever get a chance get a bacon cheeseburger deluxe with fries and some ranch dressing,mix the ranch dressing with the ketchup and then dip your burger and fries in it,you'll love it then wash it down with a banan milk shake and make sure to have a glass of water after that,i learned how to play girl anachorism on guitar believe it or not,pretty hard,even harder when i try to sing and play but i'll get it down good,goodnight and good morning to you both.........p.s.i can't wait to hear the new stuff O_o

the bitter mediocre artist said...

ha another post so quickly! you're killing me! um yeah. uhhhh yeah :D

i'm the 2nd to comment!

moussaka said...

dancing in the kitchen and lip-synching in the bathroom are two activites particularly good for the soul. cats are another, but it probably wouldn't like you never being there and all.

UrbanCelt said...

lip-synching and singing in the car is good too :) Something I do on a daily basis. Tho dancing in the car isnt recommended hehe

andrea said...

That's great Amanda, I'm really happy for you. I think my faith that I won't fall prey to the music poisoning is being restored. And thank God for that light. Try to take it easy and enjoy time with your friends and family this week, you've definitely earned it.

Andrea

Judy said...

i find taking baths weird. because you're forced to look at yourself naked, while taking showers, there's always soap or water pretending to be anything but clear covering you. and when i'm forced to look at myself naked, well that makes me want to look at the light...and blind myself.

juxtagon said...

Ah, a classic album!
I hope you went the full hog and waved flowers around while wearing NHS specs and a broken hearing aid.

Mystery Bug said...

For 5 years I have been on a creative streak that overtook my life in every way imaginable. My Mother passed away from MS last year, and it stopped. Now I never finish anything. I have joined 3 bands that I loved, and promptly quit. Listening to canned music seems like something I do because I should want to, not because I really do. CD's bore me. Even the good ones.

I have had revelations that I thought were changing my life forever, yet the same hole inside me eats my aspirations and hope. Music has been the only thing I lived for, and now it seems to betray me.

Your band and this blog you write somehow gets me back to my version of normal. The music I make has nothing in common with yours, yet I do feel very connected to what you do. Your last three posts remind me how lucky I am to create anything at all. Can't wait for the next CD, and the next show. Good live music always brings me to the church.

Just Some Girl said...

Nice to know your not past the point of no return, that would be horriable. Music is a great release and with all the time you miss from touring and all the pressure i'm sure you feel with buisness in general you need a release. I'm hoping to see you live in Denver in April, i've never seen your show just know your music from cds. I'm soooo excited I can't stand it, just kidding, but i'm am totally psyched to see you and Brian mabey i'll even get to meet you guys after the show. Be strong and if you have anymore issues with this music poisoning we will definitly have to get someone to cure you pronto!

June Miller said...

This post made me smile. You make me smile. Genuinely. So few things/people have done that for me lately, so thanks.

I'm glad to hear it's not as poisonous anymore. Really, though, there's nothing poisonous about Morrissey's voice. It's like buttah.

By the way, if you have time to see a movie, I recommend V for Vendetta. I know some people are gonna get on my case for it, but honestly? You'd probably dig it. It's some powerful shit. There's a beautiful subplot involving a girl named Valerie that anyone in their right mind should be touched by. I can't tell you anymore of it, because I don't want to spoil it for you, but trust me when I say you should check it out when you have the chance.

How do even my shortest posts end up looking so large? Damn.

Plumpbeutlerchen said...

I can somewhat understand your attitude towards listening to music. I never listened to it while doing my homework, and I can't understand how people do it while reading. I find it especially distracting if I'm reading a novel in Spanish while listening to English lyrics.
I always sing in my car, then the drive isn't that boring and you can cry out really loud. In bath it's equally nice. But I just made the same experience twice: I prepare a nice bath for myself, get the music ready, sometimes drink some sparkling wine. I put on your debut album and start out really enthusiastically, singing like mad and smiling to myself when thinking of our poor neighbours. And then, at some point, it makes me really sad and I have to listen to something else or just finish my bath in silence. I can't really say what it is, but your energetic music first kind of stimulates me and then there is a crash back to earth.
As to music as something that identifies you: It sure has always been in my youth. Either you listened to Pearl Jam (I'm 24) or to Techno. Other clothes, other friends, other clubs. But I don't really find that astounding, given that one assumes that a similar taste in music entails a similar point of view of essential things, though that is not always true. But there is also the case when smeone you "hate" listens to your favorite band and you just hate it because you don't want that person to have something in common with you. Well... Ultimately I can tell you that GERMANY IS WAITING for your new CD.

P.S.: I loved you for your comment on elitist shadowbox members.

Rachel said...

dont worry...

i was drunk and honest when i wrote the last...uhhh


THREE


"comments"...



dont forget who you are...you are so beautiful and you know it. semi-commercial success just HAPPENED to happen.

love,

two admirers in san francisco.

come back soon.

SEA OF DREAMS WAS CRAZY!!!

ljveghead said...

Reading this made my day a whole lot brighter. Glad you found a connection again.

I bought the first CD during my divorce. I can't count the number of days that singing along to Good Day and The Jeep Song (The Jetta Song for me) gave me the strength to make it through another day.

Thank you.

I look forward to the new disc and a PA show or two.

Michael

gnat said...

dear amanda, in australia we have this teenage girl magazine called Dolly and it's plain awful, and one day i was on holidays in Western Australia and we were at Woolworths and i was standing near the checkout flicking through it when i saw The Cloud Room's self-titled, not-so-new album featured in their music section along with all the mainstream music i like to call "junk", and i almost cried when i saw it. The Cloud Room does not deserve the kind of following of teenage girls that regularly buy Dolly magazine, and i felt a sense of protectiveness and desperately hoped that The Dresden Dolls would never feature in Dolly.

i'm Very Sorry i missed your show when you played in sydney even though i checked the Triple J gig guide about eight times in two days. i hope you have a very nice time doing whatever you are on your way to do. i hope you will be able to post more blog entries that make me grin wildly for no reason. my father says to tell you he's sick of me getting so excited about the release of "Yes, Virginia." i bring up the topic randomly in conversations all the time.

all my love; gnat.

Provanity said...

I feel the same as you did in the last post about music. But I found after a while that it wasn't how it really seemed, it was more that I was trying too hard to let it fill me and it was only making things difficult.
So I learned to love it again and I'm sure you will too love.

And for the minute I'm highly entertained with an old demo of yours called Marys Surgeon.

[:
love always.

teaturtle said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
teaturtle said...

Amanda makes the world go round.

Hmm, random bullshit.

But yeah, sleep well.

btw, i think i'm in love with you?

teaturtle said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Eva said...

Liebe Amanda,
actually I feel about music, the way you used to. It's not exactly church for me, but mind-home! Do not desperate,
No state will last forever- they just don't- never.
Your music is often -mood improving, making me sing along loudly and forcing me to grin- soulfood for me! And thank you Brian for that!
Hope to see you in May in Hamburg!
Let's Fetz!
Gruß und Kuss aus Deutschland
Eva

Jack P Toerson said...

I wouldn't worry about typing direct follow-up posts. If you put lots of space in it still looks big :-P.

sexygoddess1971 said...

Fuck Amanda.

I've just read the last 3 entries and I feel like I'm reading myself writing.

And to think that you really read all the comments that people make so you will be reading this.

I admire you like no other. I have been waiting for a woman of your sorts to cross my life somewhere sometime and here you are a million miles away from me but I so understand where you are coming from.

You get it like I get it, you see it like I see it, you feel it like I feel it, you know where I'm coming from.

But we get back to the social status. You are a "Rock Star", I am a mere mortal living in Melbourne Australia. But fuck I assimilate with you.

Davne said...

As an interesting twist of fate, I logged in to your blog today for the first time in a million years. I just stsrted reading How Soon Is Never by Marc Spitz yesterday. It is about a 30something guy who loves The Smiths like you love your sister,mother, brother. The cosmos must want me to pull out The Queen is Dead. Thank you for reinforcing it.

Adelle said...

heya a hwas it goin,...you know what im pretty sure every one feels like that about music at some point,i know i have...they all just blur together..major minor..what ever..metallica/maiden all the same...but you know what then i found you 2 weeks ago and for the past 2 weeks 24 7 iv been playing you album over and over...its gotten to the point of driving my mother crazy...and latley iv felt pretty shity,but every time i feel crap i put on yor music and it helps a hell of alot! im getting my ticket for you when your playing temple bar soon,cnt wait to see you live!just thot i should tell you hw your music affected me, thx its cool..x

amélia said...

YOU ARE THE BEST AMANDA

pg13 said...

Dear Amanda, my name is Paul Grace and I think you're the monkey's uncle. I may be drunk and on multiple pain killers right now but tht doesn't mean I can't construct a sentence. In fact, I want to go on record and say that my grammar is impeccable where you're concerned. I wish I was a hot air balloon so I could fly in the air with you and Brian. That would be cool. Oh shucks. Franz Ferninad's on the radio show right now-- I gotta go.

UrbanCelt said...

I just watched "Sing", and I must say I was moved. I've listened to alot of music in my time but this was the first that really touched me. I can't wait to see you both at the signing in Hollywood

juxtagon said...

Um, I feel I must confess.

I stumbled drunk into a second-hand record shop, and staggered out with a copy of the Advance cd of Yes, Virginia ( full album promo). I think some journo must've been skint that week, But I feel I should do some pennance of some kind for this ;-)

Fun album, tho. production is a lot sharper, and "Shore of California" should be given the chance to live life as a full orchestra version. It's got a very Johnny Marr piano riff, tho. ( no bad thing).

I can see a few other influences in the other tracks, but I'm not going to mention them here.

And, yes, I will be going to a record shop to buy the new album when it's officially released. No sale for you lost here.

Oscillate Wildly and have fun.

JN said...

You should write more follow-up posts as appropriate and also write spontaneous brief blog entries whenever possible. I appreciate your lengthy, thoughtful blog entries tremendously, but there is also something particularly wonderful about entries that have a sense of immediacy. The ability to provide that immediacy is one of the best characteristics of the medium, and often more powerful than an entry where you try and recall and reconstruct something you've been feeling over a long period of time that is already behind you. I'm by no means saying that your usual blog entries are anything less than wonderful, and I know that it's difficult to find the time to write at all, but I thought you might appreciate the feedback that briefer entries can be even more powerful sometimes for conveying your thoughts and connecting with your fans, while making less of a demand on you in terms of the time and labor that goes along with the perceived obligation to "get it all down."

Sara said...

dear stranger
love you.
or the you i expanded upon.
made you a post card but never sent it.
adieu. ((until god))
sara.

alewi22 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
alewi22 said...

Hey Amanda! I went to a NIN show in Bossier City a couple nights ago and thought about you when Trent addressed the "meatheads" about screaming their stupid asses off during Hurt. He said "it's your show and all, but it's distracting...something to think about."
Thought you would get a smile out of it!

Portrait a la femme said...

Dear Amanda and Brian,
I don't even know if I'm writing this in the right place. I don't really have any questions nor do I really need any information, I just sort of wanted to say a couple things. (writes, deletes, writes deletes) Ok so I saw you guys live sometime last year with NIN in atlanta georgia. I met you both afterwards and focused strictly on Amanda the entire time.. I stared and was amazed and thought to myself "holy god, she's right there" inching my way forward like everyone else. When it was time to meet the both of you I looked to Amanda and said "please pretend you like me" and she said "I generally do" It was completely furfilling and I left feeling great. As soon as I sat in my car to reflect however I became very pissed off at myself.. I wanted to turn around and walk all the way back whether you were there or not and say, Brian, your amazing and I'm an idiot for not requesting for you to like me as well.. I convinced myself not to because the reality of it was that he probably didn't notice but fuck an a it bothered me the whole way back to florida. Ever since I saw you live however being that you both were very nice I got even more into your music and started reading your blogs.. I don't even know how to say this without sounding rediculous but Amanda, I look up to you.. I know you hear that alot but look, Ever since i met you I've wanted to know more about you. Then when I learned more about you I wanted to be more like you. I like you because your not perfect, and because you don't try to be perfect. And because even though your not stick thin with huge fake tits and a perfectly plump ass you can run around naked and not give a fuck.. I look at myself and say, I could never do that. Anyways, I started doing different things that i would normally never do just to give it a try like drinking Tea and practicing yoga because I wanted to relate more and more. And then it sort of turned into my own and now yoga and tea is apart of me. *reads over* I don't know if your going to take this and think, your creepy stop copying me but basically I just wanted to get the point across that you have helped me in alot of ways. That just having a fan crush on you has somehow brought me into this peaceful state of mind that i can somehow put myself in when practicing yoga or drinking a cup of tea and just feeling good after I do so. Something that started out as a fan crush has become sort of internal, but in a good way and I appreciate that. So, thankyou for everything that you have given me without knowing it, and I'm sure to stick by your band and read every blog for as long as you keep doing it. I hope that if and when you read this you feel a little something knowing that not just your music is helping and influencing people but you being so open about your lifestyle is as well. And although this is still directed mostly to Amanda, BRIAN! you truly are amazing and I'm quite sure that if you started bloging more you would get email from guys and girls all over the world saying "Brian, you make me want to be a better drummer"
truly yours,
Zuravin

Spine Raptor said...

I've been debating taking a piano class ever since I arrived at college a year ago. I still haven't taken one. I've always wanted to play piano because it sounds so beautiful to me...but unfortunately guitar came more natural to me and I picked that up. When I listen to the recordings of your songs I can almost imagine the feeling you must get when you press your fingers on some keys and release musical bliss. I can relate it a bit to guitar, but ushually throwing that kind of emotion into guitar means cutting up your fingers X_x. However, I am glad that I did learn guitar early in my life...because right now I am starting to learn piano on my own (with the help of some chord charts). When I pulled out my "Such Great Heights" guitar tab print-out and played the first verse on my crap Yamahammmer keyboard I melted. I am finding it very easy to translate what I know from guitar to piano, and it's working for me. I have a friend who I play guitar with sometimes...We record some spontaneous songs on his 4-track and have fun messing around. He's a better pianist than myself, but that fact aside...having a piano in a song rather than another over-driven guitar is a nice change.
Every time I read your blog or listen to your music...I want to play music. I am at work (IT Technician/Graphic Designer) and I want to run home and create some music right now!
I think that the ability to create music is one of life's simple blisses. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't know how to play an instrument. I guess I could sing in the shower or hum things to myself. But using your own hands and imagination to create something (anything) is far better than anything else I've experienced. Sex is over-rated. Drugs are addictive and have bad side effects. Music and art...they give pleasurable feelings without shame...they're addictive...but you can quit whenever you want. Who would want to though...

-David (19)

P.S.- I want to hear you play Rainbow Connection live. I am not a fan of Kermit the Frog but the song is relaxing.

juxtagon said...

I like the Replacements cover, 1st time I've ever heard someone do their tracks, but looking at the list of covers available for download - I'm a bit stunned and surprised there is nothing from "ShockHeaded Peter" by The Tiger Lillies. You'd kinda suit doing those, plus you could get Brian to sing/shout "Fred! Fred was dead! DEAD.dead.dead.dead.dead.dead.dead."

I'll get me coat.

Theboywhodestroyedtheworld said...

hey Amanda, you worry too much ^^.
Sometimes I think I worry too much.. which is why im terrible at playing instruments in front of people:p .
You deserve one long ass break after this tour. That schedule looks dreadful 0.0 ...
Still, it brings in the $'s doesnt it. And it lets you put across a point, more than a lot of mindless repetetive jobs do these days. Oh god, Im going to be an electrician ;-;....
Take care of yourself out there in the big scary world. The new stuff, from what Ive heard, sounds great. Gues ill have to hear some more in Bimringham :) (so glad I got a ticket before it sold out!... my friends are jealous, oooh yer, you guys are popular over here ;) ).

See you in a month or two.
:)

P.S. dont suppose there is any chance you'll be playing download festival this June? Seeing you twice might be spoiling me a bit, but thats twice as good as once.

Das T said...

The Smiths

can youlive a day without them? well I had that one with 2 girls on my little local festival(www.wiesen.at) saddly the Dolls cancel all the gigs in europe last.
M & johnny Marr they always make me kind of sad but that...
no no no I just don't want to accept
I want to make a differents
is always like you live you life but at the end of the day you are alone in your bed think the abyss of sleep with is real comfort, and you wake up in the morning...

you have seen taxi driver with is one of the malest(or how can I say that?) movies ever cause It is this sense of that need for silence loneyness that overcomes you and you start thinking thinking whats out there, violent thoughts...
...
........................
na then you all of a sudden happy again for whatever reason.
Like when you here the Dolls are coming, sorry
i changed the tone but that post and you guys made me kind of...
but i am not now
3 times to lovely austria, the place I call home.
Now "Heinz aus Wien"-"Immer noch"
good song for that one.

amanda last year the two times I saw you in Austria. Vienna/Flex such a great week and then the only one at the NIN concert who wanted to see more of you.
But then I saw you two the first time like i mean like you can talk to somebody with is quit different then during a concert(like in Glasonbury, it that amanda kissing that bright eyes guy? what?).

after 1 year of reading some stuff I wanted to ask and remember.
What was that with oasis?
was that really you with oberst?
funny dvd extras!!! toilet? I know that you mean ;-)
oh forgot the stuff.
as with not looking at girls in japan in contrast to italy, well
as a man I kind of think that the one we have in Central europe and the USA, I mean you cannot say something nice to a girl you see one the street without stupid stuff coming back from here, as like I am some pervert it's just you can say something about someone you think looks beauty-full or at least good. I mean what's that kind of world?
IT IS NOT ALWAYS SEX, GOD DAMNED!!!

Well it is almost 2 in the morning, university and work tommorrow. soo i will write my second blog entry somewhere around 10 pm or something.

Just thought about "Die Ärzte" band that had that one line with is english goes like this:
"You think the others have it better just because you have never seen them cry?"
WE ARE NOT ALONE!!!

Oasis:
"In your mind your dreams are real!"

Keep on rocking!!

It just everybody seems so sad here.
sign

Emiko said...

huzzay :]

also, this is totally unrelated and i feel like a complete dork for asking this, but... will you be touring to Australia after the album release? and if so, would you by any chance be coming to perth, western australia? if so, that would be great. if not, that's okay too... though now i feel kinda bad haggling you about touring since it seems like such a draining experience to go on tour...

lightthespiral said...

im having trouble finding your dvd in stores...and i dont trust the internet enough to buy it there...im in a corner

Heather said...

And now I know how Joan of Arc felt...as the flames rose to her roman nose and her walkman started to melt...

Lights on Lonely Sidewalks said...

Ahh Baths can take you away from it all, as long as the temperature is nice and something good to listen to. Not a lot of guys, well straight guys, like myself can admit to fancy a bath. Keep being you and we will all keep listening.

Miss Ubiquity said...

I lost the love and I cried as I realised how long it'd been gone for and that I hadn't realised. I'm not going to tell you how long it was, as even the memory of that feeling eats away at me with the disappointment that I'd let things go so far without even noticing. It's not all back, but I'm making progress.

Work/love/passion/life- none of them are mutually exclusive and the balance is never at a state of equilibrium... and this is sounding a little morbid, so I leave you with a raise of my glass and say:
"Miss Palmer and all other individuals who have posted above- Here's to being on the rollercoaster with you (and please forgive me for refering to it in such a cliched manner). May we develop better immunity- but not so much that we forget to appreciate what we have, when we have it"

XX

MarkFarley said...

please please please please please come to Reading this year....

you guys are gonna rock...


DDolls for main stage... xx

Liz said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
MDhealthChannel.com said...

do you have ms

Massimo Spiga said...

I'm an italian sci-fi writer (also a comic writer!). I just wanted to tell you, in my broken english, that I just discovered WKAP and it broke my heart and made me laugh and it's the best fucking thing that passed through my ears in the last thousand years. I'm ashamed to sound this disarticulated in your language, but I wish to thank you deeply for the soul-gifts that you have given me. You have positively changed my worldview into something better and larger and uncut. I can't stop listening to "Runs In My Family", and I've done it for the last five days. I just have to steal you the lyrics and remix them in my next novel. This is not some fan bullshit, you have touched the deepest chords in my fucking being and I will translate this feeling into art. I've never told this to an artist: you just made the world a better place.

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