Wednesday, August 27, 2008

bringing charges against ben folds

so, ben folds sent me an email in which he suggested i sue him for ripping off the dresden dolls.
please weigh in.

a version of his album recently leaked on the internet, including the track "brainwascht"
which, according to mr. folds, was lifted rawther directly from "backstabber".

you'll have to go listen for yourself:

(for those of you who want to hear the whole "leak", grab it here or here while supplies last* - please share amongst yourselves if these links dry up, though)

all in favor for suing ben folds, raise your hands!
think of the fucking PR! perfect timing! seriously.
and i'm in the UK. they live for that shit. i'll be in the tabloids at last.

after that, i'm bringing charges against pete doherty for fucking my wife.

and after that, paternity charges against beth ditto. yeah.

it's gonna be an excellent year!!!!!!!!!!!!!

in other news, ben folds also just released an amazing fucking video for the song you've all been asking about
("cologne"....the very one i've been opening the show with).
he had invited me to be part of the "piano orchestra" a few months ago but i couldn't make it....and i'm wicked kicking myself.
god dammit, i wish i'd been there. best. video. ever. the whole thing is filmed at ben's in nashville...
the same studio where i made the record....and slept, and wrote, and mixed, and did Noga every day.
in fact, if you look at the top of the stairs (where the naked guy with the tamborine is standing - yum) that's where my bed was :)

love from londontown

p.s. PRAWNs
p.p.s. for those of you asking EXACTLY where we're going to be playing footsie tomorrow...sorry, "footie"....we'll be in the main triangle green of sheperd's bush.
take tube to central holland park and walk or take hammersmith to sheperd's bush. i assure won't be able to miss us. we'll be the ones playing soccer, looking like idiots. BRING CAMERAS, by the way. if enough of us take video, we can pool it and make a movie about "being free".

google maps that shit

(* the real-deal ben folds album is due out september 30th and you can order it in all sorts of varieties, apparently...)

Monday, August 25, 2008

soccer...sorry, "football", anyone?

i am staying in london instead of going to the fringe....i just couldn't handle anymore planes or trains.
the london gig was off the hook. life is working.
i am holed up in a hotel for a week, trying to catch up on emails and life.

1. i am listening to new music this week and starving for content.
please post here any incredible albums that you think i might not know. i'm getting in shape for the "leeds" video and downloading single albums to listen to back-to-front while i work out.
hit me. any era, any genre.

2. i am kind of bored. yesterday, i bought a soccer ball, and some charity-shop sneakers, to cheer myself up.

3. i noticed on my walk home that there is a big field (albeit its sort of gross and ridden with drunks and junkies) near my hotel.

pick-up soccer/football game, anyone? let's fucking do it.
3 pm, shepards bush, this wednesday the 27th.
i am not kidding. we need at least 8 people to have a decent game. if we have too many people, we'll figure it out, we can rotate being athletes and hooligans, drinking beers on the sidelines and getting into brawls.
we'll play til about 5 or 6 and then HAVE TEA somewhere.
shepards bush is a total hole, but we'll find a place i'm sure.
please do wear appropriate footwear.

in other news....

the stencil mission is going well....people are posting up teasers on the shadowbox.
if you still want to enter, the deadline is far off and details about the mission are HERE.
here are some inspirations.....

by BHA/Sarah



(click any of the above images to be taken to the thread with full size images and lots more of inspirational stencil-y stuff)

here is another great one from my talk at mass art:

by dena bach

in related stencil-y-ness:

my friend olga sent me this incredible link....
a couple created an interactive choose-your-own-adventure stencil-romance project in the streets of San Fran:
i fucking love the world.

more soon. i am cleaning out my head.

love & rocket (comes with all meals here, on the side. kind of like lettuce, only not.),


p.s. the keyboard player for oasis walked by me at breakfast this morning. SIGN FROM JESUS??? i think so.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

alone & grateful & losing

things have been going extraordinarily well but too fast.
and i am dizzy.

i did a mini-tour of the states (new york, chicago, toronto, LA and san fran) and then without going home I came over to europe and did four festival shows with brian,
now three more solo shows in germany and london. then i'm going to haul myself up to edinburgh just to be there. then i am coming back to london for the video shoot
for "leeds united". fancy fancy fast fast fast.

my life is shifting. touring solo is unfamiliar, but it's so so so good. i'm getting used to it.
playing solo and then playing with brian and going straight back to solo was certainly weird and educational.

the thing that i didn't anticipate or think too much about is how different my gauge is when i'm playing alone.
i had gotten so used to always factoring brian into everything it that breaking myself of the pattern is weird.
it's all me now, there's no drummer factor, at all. this has it's pros and cons. it's a little lonely but it's also not.
sometimes being onstage with brian, when we weren't connected, made it feel impossible to connect to the crowd.

when alone, the shows can become completely impulsive and random, and they have been.
but i feel a little like pavlov's dog waiting for the shock to kick in.
i'm sure it's similar to the feeling you have when you get divorced or break up with a long-term lover.
you're excited by the liberation but you also miss the routine, however complicated.

i've been feeling more grateful than usual.

grateful to ben folds, for making this fucking amazing record for reasons i am still trying to comprehend.
grateful to neil gaiman, for appearing magically and writing for me and being my friend.
grateful to emily white, my manager, for being back in my life and being so passionate about music and her work.

this is starting to sound like the acknowledgments of a book.
but i'm feeling it, fuck it.

grateful to beth hommel, my incredible assistant, for coming into my life right when i needed help badly and making EVERYTHING go.
where i would be without her right now, i'm not sure, but i'm pretty sure i'd be on Planet Fucked.
grateful to brian, for being in a band with me and teaching me more than he'll ever know.
grateful to psycho dave, for touring with me and getting me a band-aid last night.

grateful to the universe in general for setting shit up. i can't believe it worked.


i have been losing and breaking things.
i don't like travel for this reason.
i feel like i've gotten RELATIVELY more responsible as the years pass.
i don't lose things as easily as i used to. i used to lose keys and wallets with astounding frequency.

but when you are, for several weeks in a row, on a daily treadmill of taxis, hotel rooms, planes, trains, cluttered dressing rooms with no tables,
restaurants and friend's houses, with people milling around you and loud music playing, things get lost. they get broken.
i try to let things go.
i try not to get upset.
i try to see wasted money and lost irreplaceable clothing as ephemeral, and then i wonder if that only makes me more prone to losing things.

in LA, i lost my iPod. i bought a new one. but the record's leaked ANYWAY.

in hamburg last night, i lost my favorite jacket. but it's relatively warm today.

somewhere in california i lost my cap. i really liked it. but my head must not be covered for survival.

in Utrecht i cut my hand open on my ukulele case. but the cut wasn't too bad and i have a nice pretty bandage and my sister had some neosporin.

in chicago, i lent emilyn "cupcake punk" brodsky my socks. she offered to give them back at the end of the night, actually, but things had just gone too far. it wasn't worth

also in chicago, someone stepped on my mac. the screen became modern art. that someone was kate lane.

BUT.....they know me at the mac store, so a few days later the guys in new york HOOKED ME UP with a new screen. for free. life is wonderful that way. (thanks mac store!)
and kate lane felt really bad and so in exchange, she gave me her pony sweater that i had been coveting. and so i got my mac fixed AND i got the pony sweater. i was almost glad it happened.
am i terrible?

dear amanda,
you stupid cunt.
why don't you keep your iPod in one fucking place and keep track of it when you lend it to people?
and why didn't you put your jacket away in your suitcase? you loved your jacket. now it's gone forever.
and why did you leave your fucking computer on the floor where someone could step on it?
you are an irresponsible child and i hate you.
will you ever mature and take care of your shit?
way to go, fuckface.

dear amanda,
i know, i know, i know.
please forgive me.
tour is a bitch. life becomes random.
i am trying.
please love me,

i am somewhat terrified because i am about to embark on a fucking 3 month tour with TWELVE PEOPLE (zoe, jason, lyndon, my crew and the whole danger ensemble)
in venues the same size as the ones we've been playing. there's been almost no privacy and space and we're currently a touring party of TWO (me & psycho dave). .
it's going to be an interesting life. we might kill each other.
I wonder what i can do to never lose anything.

maybe i should just not HAVE anything.
but i sort of NEED things.
clothes keep me warm, my iPod carries my music, my computer keeps my life in place.
i am in a bind here. fuck.


random photos from tour....:

backstage feeling torn between solitude and ponies.

me & dad in LA, singing leonard cohen. it was awesome.
sadly i don't think anyone filmed it.

at the troubadour in the balcony:

(photo from

San Fran:

with vermillion lies (who are AMAZING!!!! check them out:

(photo from


the PONY SWEATER!!!!! (thanks kate):

(both by

(Photo by Denis Farr)

New York....(new york was sooooooooooooo goooooooooooooooooood)

(sign photos by

i did an introduction to the set by imitating bob dylan and lip-syncing ben folds....

awesome photo collage by bob lopez/almus.

there's a good live clip of it (from chicago) HERE

time to look at the cows.


Friday, August 01, 2008

me, neil & the children

shot amazing photos all day.
exhausted, not ready for tour, fine.
in. love. with. life. and all it has to bring, good and bad.

in other news....
scaring children, again, amanda?
got to stop that.

neil gaiman posted this to his blog yesterday and got the following comment.
we tried to make up for it today and take some nice WHOLESOME photos on the set.

it's been an excellent week.

(well, it IS a bit of a crotch shot.....)

Hi Neil, is that lady wearing a slip? It looks nasty. What does Maddy (neil's 13 year old daughter, -ed.) think about that picture? My mom says it's in bad taste. LOL Patti

I think Maddy's been around film sets and photo sets enough to know that film and photo sets are fictional. That was Amanda's costume for the photo shoot on the roof that preceded the photos you saw. (Below you can see three out of six of today's costumes in pictures that, I hope, will be more reassuring and family friendly. Except possibly for the first, now I come to think of it.) Kyle is shooting a book of photographs called "Who Killed Amanda Palmer". Amanda is in all the pictures -- which are a lot like scenes from movies -- and I'm writing very short stories to accompany them. I'm trying to do the majority of them while I'm here, as my plate is scarily full right now, and it seemed easier and faster just to come out while many of the photos were being taken and see what was going on and write.

The photos yesterday, and the ones below, were all taken by Kyle between actual shots, because the man does not put down his camera.

cross-posted from kyle's blog (

me & neil downstairs

neil, me & kyle...

note the re-appearance of the famous "fuck me when you're ready to text" shirt.
it will be available soon from post-war trade. yay.

love love.